Next time you get the opportunity, shake it, milk it, gooch press etc. Then take a single sheet of paper and press it flush against your pee hole. You’ll still notice a small drop that would have otherwise gone in your underwear. That’s why I always use a toilet if I’m able to. And urinals are gross, there’s always splashback even if you can’t see it.
(No shade at you specifically btw, I didn’t downvote you)
Also the Peter principle
FBI Director Kash Patel was so upset about being criticized on social media that he directed bureau agents to find offending accounts and respond to them.
On Thursday, journalist Seth Hettena found texts released by the FBI under the Freedom of Information Act showing conversations where Patel ordered the FBI’s Assistant Director for Public Affairs, Ben Williamson, to respond to a X poster with the name “Ifindretards.”
The February post said Patel’s “retard rating just went to all time highs. Congratulations Kash.”
Patel thought the post warranted a reply, and pressured agents to “continuously” respond with the bureau’s “record year results.” Hettena simulated how the text exchange would look on an iPhone:
When Williamson protested that responding to @IfindRetards would “look bad” on Patel, the director responded that “it’s not about them, it is about the number of views, because people see it and need to be seeing our stats.”
It’s quite a waste of FBI resources to go after an online troll, but Patel has been overly concerned with social media throughout his tenure, revealing sensitive information from multiple investigations including the Charlie Kirk assassination. Patel isn’t particularly concerned about the bureau’s resources, either, having used them to jet-set around the world partying and hanging out with his singer girlfriend.
Patel only has his job because of his loyalty to President Trump, publishing an enemies list before Trump was elected in 2024. Since he was narrowly confirmed by the Senate last year, Patel’s stewardship of the FBI has been marked by scandal after scandal, and he quickly lost the confidence of the agents under his command. Right now, the only reason Patel still has his job is that he hasn’t lost the confidence of the president
To lampshade (or lampshading) as a verb means to intentionally call attention to an improbable, clichéd, or absurd element in a story to neutralize audience disbelief.
Most users on Reddit agree that the term comes from the metaphor of “hanging a lampshade” on something—making an awkward or glaring object even more conspicuous rather than trying to hide it.
TIL
Fuck you no there’s not
Methinks they were being silly
Sunscreen
I think you should probably heat your food for more than 1 second
Methinks she was pretending to not (know how to) know for the bants
Me no understand
You just decide. Everybody knows it’s a choice