• saltesc@lemmy.world
    44·
    2 days ago

    Ladies… Your partner knows you fart. You don’t know that they know, but they know. You may have been holding them in most of the day, keeping up appearances for the myth, but the day does end, and you do sleep. At this point, it all comes out, audibly and now stinkier than what it would’ve been a couple hours ago.

    You don’t know how many times you’ve Dutch ovened your partner, but it’s been quite a few. On some occasions, they’ve even quietly left the bedroom for a few mins in utter shock. They’ll never tell you because they’re too nice, but here lies the avoidable irony of your actions…just let them out as designed. They won’t care. If they do, recommend them a sex doll since being a human apparently isn’t doing it for them.

    Source: Every female partner I’ve been with that does this.

    • dkppunk@piefed.socialEnglish
      7·
      1 day ago

      When I know I’m about to fart, I make sure to look directly at my partner right before it comes out, just so I know exactly when he hears it. I love seeing the look on his face, it makes me laugh. He usually just rolls his eyes and says I’m gross lol

      I also belch louder than him.

      I am not ashamed for passing any kind of gas and no other ladies should be either!

        • dkppunk@piefed.socialEnglish
          2·
          1 day ago

          lol I love that!

          My go to line for burping is yelling “carbonated beverages!” Because it’s usually a seltzer induced belch :D

    • zout@fedia.io
      23·
      1 day ago

      I don’t know your age or where you’re from, but in my experience girls just let it rip when their partner is the only one around.

      • saltesc@lemmy.world
        13·
        1 day ago

        Yeah, to me that’s normal. But if I think about it, it’s been more 50/50. Of course none of this starts happening for anyone in the relationship until around end of month three, aka. the honeymoon phase is over and you’re no longer dating each other’s PR reps.

        The relationship has started when someone has let out a fart on the couch and it wasn’t socially weird, like it would’ve been hour three into date 1.